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 They are back! The world's Original Celtic Renaissance duo, the Brobdingnagian Bards, are back brandishing their autoharp, recorder, mandolin and wicked wit to share their music and unique look on life with the world. Experience their love of science fiction and fantasy movies and TV along with a glimpse inside the music creation and experiences that make them legendary on the Renaissance festival circuit.

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  2. Do Virgins Taste Better?

Do Virgins Taste Better?

Jan 25, 2023

Do groundhogs taste better than than those that do not? We talk a wee bit bit about the movie. We also dig deep into the "Do Virgins Taste Better Medley". We can't help but compare what is funny now versus what used to be funny.

It’s all on the Brobdingnagian Bards Podcast #74

THANK YOU NAGIANS!

Brobdingnagian Bards are The Original Celtic Renaissance music duo. They take traditional Irish and Scottish songs and give them a comedic twist. Their unique brand of music on the autoharp, recorder, and mandolin put Austin, Texas on the Celtic music map.

Brobdingnagian Bards music is financed entirely by their fans in the Nagians Only Club. For just $5 per month, you can support the Brobdingnagian Bards and help them create new music while enjoying bootleg concerts, videos, and first access to new songs.

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0:02 - NAGIANS ONLY:

  • Zingers
  • Recording and editing shows
  • Running your mouth
  • Life’s A Faire
  • Faire drama…
  • That 90’s show

20:14 - SONG: “Auld Lang Syne” from Real Men Wear Kilts

24:34 - HOW LONG IS A BROBDINGNAGIAN MINUTE?

  • Today’s theme: Groundhog Day
  • What’s new? What song would you like to hear us talk about?

31:55 - UPCOMING SHOWS

  • APR 1-2, 8-9: Sherwood Forest Faire, Paige, TX
  • APR 6: Dragon Con Filk Music Concert with Brobdingnagian Bards @ 7 PM CST

MARC

  • FEB 9: Cat Drinking Songs Concert on Bandcamp @ 7 PM ET
  • MAR 15: St Patrick's Day Internet Concert @ 7 PM ET
  • JUN 3-10: Celtic Invasion Vacations, County Mayo, Ireland

ANDREW

  • MONDAYS: Faire Life @ 7 PM CT, Back on Jan 30

39:48 - TODAY’S STORY:

58:03 - SONG: “Do Virgins Taste Better Medley” from A Faire to Remember

SONG LYRICS

Do Virgins Taste Better

words by Randy Farran, music Traditional

A dragon has come to our village today.
We've asked him to leave, but he won't go away.
Now he's talked to our king and they worked out a deal.
No homes will he burn and no crops will he steal.

Now there is but one catch, we dislike it a bunch.
Twice a year he invites him a virgin to lunch.
Well, we've no other choice, so the deal we'll respect.
But we can't help but wonder and pause to reflect.

* Do virgins taste better than those who are not?
Are they salty, or sweeter, more juicy or what?
Do you savor them slowly? Gulp them down on the spot?
Do virgins taste better than those who are not?

Now we'd like to be shed you, and many have tried.
But no one can get through your thick scaly hide.
We hope that some day, some brave knight will come by.
'Cause we can't wait around 'til you're too fat to fly.

Now you have such good taste in your women for sure,
They always are pretty, they always are pure.
But your notion of dining, it makes us all flinch,
For your favorite entree is barbecued wench.

Now we've found a solution, it works out so neat,
If you insist on nothing but virgins to eat.
No more will our number ever grow small,
We'll simply make sure there's no virgins at all!

The Dragon's Retort

words by Claire Stephens, music traditional

Now, I am a dragon. Please listen to me.
For I'm misunderstood to a dreadful degree.
This ecology needs my and I know my place.
But I'm fighting extinction with all of my race.

Well, I came to this village to better my health
Which is ever so poor, despite all my wealth.
But I get no assistance and no sympathy,
Just impertinent questioning shouted at me.

* Yes, virgins taste better than those who are not.
But my favorite snack mixed with peril is fraught.
For my teeth will decay and my trim go to pot.
Yes, virgins taste better than those who are not.

Well, I'm really quite kind almost all through the year.
Vegetarian ways are now mine out of fear.
But a birthday needs sweets as I'm sure you'll agree.
And barbecued wench tastes like candy to me

As it happens our interests are almost the same.
You see I'm really quite skillful at managing game.
If I ate just your men, would your excess decline?
Of course not, the rest would just make better time.

Now, the number of babies a woman can bare
Has limits. That's why my prunings done there.
And an orphan's a sad sight and so when I much.
I'm careful to eat only virgins for lunch

The Brobdingnagian Bards Podcast was produced by Marc Gunn, and Andrew McKee. Sign up to our mailing list to download free MP3s and get monthly updates of what's new. Find it all at thebards.net